That recurring problem may be your fault.

It happened again yesterday, and this time he couldn’t bear it, he came to me angrily and asked, “Why is it that you don’t eat when I’m eating at the dining?

“Today, I made sure you were at the dining table before I came and you stood up again to finish your food at the kitchen. I’ve been silently observing this attitude of yours and I tried to caution how I chew, I also ensure that I observe all table manners, yet you’re not satisfied.

“When you know you can’t stand me, why did you marry me?”

I just stood still like a statue, sobbing like an infant. As I watched the innocent man speaking furiously, something he never did, and to think the fault of the matter is not his, I became overwhelmed.

I later found my voice and blurted out, “It’s not you, it’s me!! “I’m the one with a brain disorder.”

Then I tried explaining how, since I was a child, I can’t stand anyone eating beside me. I get very irritated, and very angry when anyone is eating beside me, no matter how cautious that person is chewing. It still annoys me, that’s why I barely eat at parties or go on dates.

I asked a doctor friend, and he said it’s a brain disorder. Google later confirmed it.

So, I apologized to my dear husband, we made plans on how I will get over it, and we moved on.

But the issue has got me thinking ever since.

You have a very nice personality, and yet you seem not to get your circle of friends right, maybe it’s your fault. Maybe you need to look inwards and see what you’re doing wrong.

You have brilliant business plans, but executing it seems to be a big problem and you blame finances and man power, maybe your brilliant business plan isn’t good enough. Maybe you need to seek advices from those who has ran similar businesses successfully before blaming the universe. Maybe it’s you!

You’re a wife and you believe you’ve done everything possible to please your husband and yet he’s not reciprocating the love. I’m not saying men are perfect, but sometimes maybe you’re doing the right things in the wrong ways, or at the wrong time. Maybe you need to try a bit more or get better in a particular thing. Maybe it’s you!

You’re a single lady or lad, with good home training and behavior and the men/girls seems not pleased with you or something about you, and you’re left heartbroken. Maybe it’s you. Maybe you need to look inwards for solution.

Sometimes we need to look inwards to perfect our flaws and seek help. Don’t be too stubborn to seek help. No one is perfect. That particular one thing that you don’t see as a big deal can be your major flaw or clause.

Don’t be too proud to seek help. Your flaws can be corrected if you agree you need help.

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Columnist, entrepreneur and mother.

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