Once Bitten Twice Shy

Protesting Students

‘Greatest Nigerian students!’ Femi chanted.

‘Great!’ the students responded.

‘Greatest gbo gbo! he continued.

‘Gbo gbo!’ the responses shook the roof of the school pavilion.

Femi, who happened to be the President of the Student Union Government, marvelled at the feedback from the students; there was no denying the fact that their excitement knew no bounds.

‘Change is the only constant thing in life,’ Femi continued, ‘by this time last week, we were still groaning under the weak leadership of Professor Kensington; and now, that we have a new Vice-Chancellor, I can see everything turning around for our good. Can I get three gbozas for our new Vice-Chancellor?’

‘Gboza! Gboza!!! Gboza!!!’ the students responded excitedly.

‘Thank you very much. There is a way my people in Yoruba greet their neighbour whenever a good thing happens; and that is, ‘ema eku orire. Now, I want you to turn to your neighbour and greet him or her, ema eku orire o…’

The loud response which resonated around about the school pavilion was akin to the type you hear at refugee camps whenever an announcement of fresh supplies are made.

‘While we all bask in this new era of change, I want you to cast your minds back to the era of Professor Kensington…’

‘Constant power outage, embezzlement of funds, insecurity in our campus, …’ the allegations soared.

‘It’s okay!’ Femi pacified, ‘if I allow you to continue, none of us would leave here today. I’m very optimistic that with Professor Iyanda at the helm of affairs now, very soon, the massive rot in the system would soon become a history…’

‘Please excuse me,’ a student raised his arm, ‘what about the money we contributed towards security during Kensington’s era?’

‘That one don enter voicemail…’ Femi replied, sadly, ‘unfortunately, our dear old Kensington, diverted all the funds into his pocket!’

‘Ah!’ The students shook their heads.

‘However, he has been given an ultimatum up till next month to refund the entire money otherwise, Kirikiri would become his next residence.’

‘Good riddance to bad rubbish!’ a handful of students chorused.

‘Now, in the spirit of Aluta, can we all recite our anthem… Soli…soli…soli…’

Solidarity forever… (3x)

We shall always fight for our right…’

*********

THREE YEARS LATER…

‘Aluta continua!’

Victoria ascerta

An angry mob marched angrily with placards of different sizes, led by Femi, towards the Vice-Chancellor’s office.

‘Aluta continua!’

Victoria ascerta!

The Vice-Chancellor, Professor Iyanda, strode in majestically  to witness the drama.

‘Greatest Nigerian students!’ Femi chanted.

‘Great!’

‘Enough is enough!’ Femi addressed the Vice-Chancellor, ‘sir, with all due respect, the entire students of this great institution are fed up with your administration. Beyond the incessant power outage on the campus, the rate of harassment of our colleagues by some unknown hoodlums has immensely increased. Sir, as I speak, Joseph Okezie, my course-mate, is  battling for his life at the Federal Medical Centre…’ on and one Femi reeled out the litany of cases of molested students  he could remember.

‘To be honest with you, my dear students, I can feel your pulse,’ Professor Iyanda calmly addressed the aggrieved students, ‘the extent of the rot I inherited from Kensington is not just alarming, but very massive; I would need more time to clean up…’

‘Tales by moonlight!’ the crowd grew wilder.

‘That’s okay, it’s natural for you to be annoyed,’ the Professor continued, ‘however, I like doing my things one after the other. Beginning with the issue of security; the menace of hoodlums would soon become a thing of the past. I’m already  making plans to deploy some special Police force…’ he paused and then toned down his voice, ‘the budget is about a million naira; and since we have limited funds to work with, a certain percentage of the funds would be sourced from your school fees…’

‘Oga, go straight to the point!’ one anonymous student remarked angrily.

‘The implication of the above is that, it would lead to an increment in your school fees…’

‘We no go gree o! we no go gree!!’ the outburst from the students escalated.

 ‘This is just the part 2 of another form of extortion!’ one of the students turned to his colleague.

‘What’s your problem, Olumide?’ his colleague challenged him, ‘that guy is making some sense.’

‘Obinna, I’ve stayed longer in this school before you came to know that once bitten, you have to be twice shy. The past Vice-Chancellor, made a similar announcement some years back, but when he received the money, he squandered it on frivolities.’

‘But the security of the students is paramount,’ Obinna maintained.

‘I know, but a million Naira is far too much. I bet you, this school is about to witness a repeat episode of what Kensington did during his tenure.’

‘Let’s just watch and see, rather  than judging him…’ Obinna stressed.

Final Remarks: As the news of the recent $1bn Boko Haram fund request by the President rages on the front burner, mixed reactions from Nigerian masses continue to trail it. While some wonder why the present administration will need such huge amount for a ‘technically defeated’ terrorist group, others wonder if Buhari/Burutai are not about to play a GEJ/Dauski in the run-up to the 2019 general elections as we all witnessed in the run-up to 2015 general elections.

Hmmm, to stay abreast of this trend, simply visit the $1bn Boko Haram Fund hashtag 
for fresh updates.